[Must Read] SantosNaija Writes On Year 2018: "But It Was Worse For Me"

"But it was worse for me" I wonder if everyone thought it was worse for them.. I'm weeping while typing this, I never will be ashamed to weep, tears are only water. 2018 has been troublesome for me, I passed through tests I thought I won't escape, neither will I be permitted to be around to this time.
But here am I. I kept my cool, took time like the river that grows stale. Kept going slowly but steady, no hurry no rush.

It started while I was still in Jos. I'm saying this because what I passed through may collapse someone.  Series of disappointment came along when I least expected it. Ranging from investing online, Job hunting, making Harmony with my creator: In all I score less. I met people who we walked through all along some succeeded, others seemed hopeful, to me I couldn't count any blessing the year 2018.

When I arrived Taraba; my home, my hope. Lo! I felt homeless, I felt hopeless. I have to express this raw here.. because what brought me back turned its back against me, it wasn't easy. Still moving, asking God to direct my part as I began wanting to question his very existence! God forbid, for I have grown to understand why things happens the way it happened. I say Lord, let thy will be Lord.

If you have never eaten while crying you don't know what life tastes like. Again, I  took a hopeful deal courageously, had a plan with my elder sis. Thereon my peace was restored a bit. For quiet long I was never as happier, but that moment. Lo! We could not keep the deal on. Her life (my elder sis) was lost minute by minute, right before me, right before my eyes, slowly as death came around, we waited in hope for her to rise again 'Alice' my beloved. Until last gasp of life that remained in Alice ceased to exist, she was gone, the deal gone, our plans for reviving again died along with her. I said to my self it is finished. I pitied my self. My siblings who had hope in me and Alice were helpless. Well, I still thank God for whatever.

 Now left alone with no option, but with options. Haaa... I'm a happy person, it's up to me to whether to win or lose. My passion for blogging kept me alive all these while. Who cares if somebody dances better? Doing my very best is rewarding internally.

The year 2018 cometh along with its joy moments, with people of outstanding personalities whom I must confess walked the journey along with me through rough and smooth, through thick, through thin such as: Chigozie (Owerri, IMO Nigeria), Jossy O., Sylvester (Warri, Delta Nigeria), Obinna (Durbai, UAE), James I. (Jos, Nigeria), MacMillan B.( New York, USA), Faith (Onitsha, Nigeria) Gbenga, Praize, (Lagos, Nigeria) Emmanuela P. (Shendam, Nigeria) Gabriel O., Oscar, Chinonso C. My Family (Jalingo, Nigeria) Best O., Paddy D. (Porthacourt, Nigeria), Eddy, Osidor (Benin, Nigeria). Numerous to mention, life with you has been a blessing throughout 2018. Thank you.

Toh, 2019 here comes thee. God never promised sun without the rain. Sometime you laugh, other times  you feel there's no reason to laugh. I understood these that's what leading me. I call on Jehovah jireh, Jehovah nissi, Jehovah shammah, el shaddai, Ellohim, I am that I am, unchangeable changer, yaweh to turn around towards me, my case, make me bounce back in hope for better 2moro. 2019 I call upon thee to have your way and the blessings stored therein shall manifest in my family in Jesus  name. Lord help me to love you more and more. My tomorrow must be greater than today.
Happy New year.
Chrisantus Michael
Social commentator, public Analyst, media strategist based in Jalingo, Nigeria.

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